Dr. House sings

Yeah, I've pretty much given up on updating this thing in any sense of regularity or coherence. If anything, you imaginary readers (maybe some poor schmoes who accidentally clicked onto this thing from the links at Comics Should Be Good) can expect, oh, sporadic non-sequitirs and wacky pictures and maybe an incoherent rant here or there.

Anyway, here's Hugh Laurie being awesome:

SHA---*coughcough* or "How To Cast a Captain Marvel Movie"

Remember, I can't draw. At all. But this idea was too good to pass up. So here is Bruce Campbell as Captain Marvel!

Click to enlarge.



I didn't ink it because, well, when I ink things, I ruin them. And it took twenty minutes of fighting with my scanner to get this image looking like this, anyway. But... there it is! Voila!

Happy Father's Day

No, I haven't posted in a while.

Yes, Comics Should Be Good has moved. We're on CBR now. Clicky the linky.

Carry on.

The 2005 Year-in-Review Revue

I’d like to say that year went by fast, but frankly I lost track of it anyway. January, you say? I didn’t notice. I’ve been too busy watching my Wonderfalls DVDs which all you gits should have purchased and watched and loved by now. It’s the most brilliant cancelled show in years.

So, did this year suck? A bit. I think. From what I can remember. Good year for storms. And pirates. And yeah, there were a few good comics which will be covered over on Comics Should Be Good over the next week or so. Check those out. My opinions are the best. Naturally.

I’m speaking in very short sentences today. Phrases, mostly. Defying the rules of grammar? Yes. Screw grammar. I am a writer, and hence I can invent my own grammar. Other poor schmucks have to abide by the rules. Poor bastards.

(Is my surliness coming across as comedic or more assholish? I’m trying to perfect my asshole comedy.)

Anyway, 2005. Let’s all just agree that it sucked now and move on. But then, what about those gleaming bright spots throughout the craptacularity (it’s a word now, dammit. Yes, I could’ve just said ‘craptacle’ but there’s no going back now) of the past 26 fortnights? They deserve coverage too. So I’ll talk about, like, pop culture. Because, y’know, reality? I’m not a big fan. I try not to pay attention to it. It hates me enough as it is.

Best Movie: There were a few contenders for this. Naturally, there are the nerd picks, which include Batman Begins, as well as the movie I eventually chose as my favorite. But then, there was Sin City, which had surprising mainstream appeal (especially for a black and white comic adaptation that may be the most violent movie ever). Another good one was The 40 Year Old Virgin, the funniest movie I’ve seen in years. However, these cannot surpass the glory that was Serenity. We nerds stick with our own. Action! Comedy! Romance! Fist-pumping awesomeness! How could I ever doubt Joss Whedon? I mean, I was no big fan of Firefly, but the movie made a believer out of me and it totally kicked Star Wars’s ass. Yes, Revenge of the Spliff sucked, though not as much as War of the Worlds.

Side note: This year, I hit a record for most times I ended up watching stuff in the theater for full price. Damn. I hate spending money.

Best TV Show: Now, it was not Lost. You Lost nerds can skip to the next part now, and the truly righteous will keep reading.

Still with us? Good. Okay, this year I officially became addicted to medical dramas. House! Grey’s Anatomy! ER reruns on TNT every morning! I know. Dreadful, isn’t it? And then, well, there was the return of Family Guy. And Arrested Development remained the world’s smartest comedy. So what did I end up going with?

Boston Legal. Yes, I still shamelessly love this show (Canada episode? Best episode ever.) I’m going to cheat, however, and declare it a tie. The co-winner? House. I mean, I never thought a cohabitation domicile could carry a doctor show either, but it did.

Edit: Never mind. Screw it. I'm giving it to Arrested Development anyway. Bwahaha.

Best Book: What the hell’s a book?

I’d do an Actor/Director/Writer thing, but I’m lazy. So, screw it. Hee hee.

P.S. I’ve become addicted to this Kingdom of Loathing game. Yes, I’m the last one to find out about it. But it’s fun. Try it out if you haven’t already. It’s a good game for nerds and dorks. Like yourselves, lowly peasants, for I am your Nerd King.

Of course, I’ve only just now become addicted to the Grand Theft Auto games (except San Andreas which refuses to work on my Xbox, the bastard), but I already know I’m the last person on Earth to start playing that. Bah.

Go buy Wonderfalls now. I command thee.

Addendum:


You are Wash. Not only are you a great pilot, you
are also the joker of the group. Your devotion
to your wife is admirable, though you sometimes
feel insecure. Thank god you shaved off your
moustache.


Which Firefly character are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

We all saw this coming.

Coolest Old People

So here's a top ten list of the coolest old people that are still alive. I think they pretty much speak for themselves, and I'm too lazy to make with the 'splainy. Readysetgogogadgethotpants!

10. Hugh Hefner
9. Bob Barker
8. Stan Lee
7. Carol Channing
6. Kurt Vonnegut
5. Sean Connery
4. Alan Alda
3. Adam West
2. William Shatner
1. Abe Vigoda

Honorable Mentions: Michael Caine, Clint Eastwood, Gerald Ford, Angela Lansbury, Carl Reiner, Andy Rooney, Elvis.

ASS2ASS*

It's later. Here's more.

All-Star Superman, simply put, is brilliant. Grant Morrison just instinctively *gets* it. Buy it now.

P.S. See what I did with the title there? Utilizing the acronym of the comic and relating it to the name of Morrison's band, ass2ass? No? Well, I thought it was funny...

This Just In...

All-Star Superman = Awesome.

More later.

The Greatest Thing of All Time

One guy playing a jaunty tune and reading out 700 hobo names for an hour.

It's utterly brilliant.

(And is that 'Big Rock Candy Mountain' he's strumming?)

I am a leaf on the wind.

Go see Serenity.

NOW!

Best Ye Be Talkin' Like a Pirate, or It Be the Plank for Yeh!

Avast, ye land-lubbers. 'Tis the 19th of Septembarrr, and so it be Talk Like a Pirate Day! Yarrr. And if ye don't wish to be walkin' the plank or swabbin' the poop deck or fetchin' me bunghole, ye be wantin' to pay attention to me pimpin' this'n following comical novelette: Scurvy Dogs!

This be true pirate literature, it be. Also it be hilarious and zany romp about pirates and hobos and monkeys and Portuguese lepers and pop culture references. Arr.

Buy it here, but be lookin' at their site first, matey. Truly, it be the funniest comic book evarrr made.

Gyarr. It's a pirate's life for me.

I Will Write Aquaman for Free (DC, I'm callin' you out!)

Reprinted from Comics Should Be Good:

Attention! DC Editorial. This is Bill Reed speaking. Do not adjust your monitors. I am in control of the internet. It's also come to my attention, thanks to Lying in the Gutters (no fancy links, I'm pressed for time! You all know where it is, anyway), that no creative team has yet been chosen for Aquaman (unless it has. In which case, bah).

I offer you my services, for free. I shall write Aquaman, and it shall be glorious. And it will cost you nothing.

All I ask for is one year to prove my mettle; and in that time, (or even six months), if sales are not doubled on what they current are (which is from 15-17k if I remember correctly), I shall eat something which most folks would consider inedible.

Trust me; I've got a fun pitch. I've got mad ideas. I am Grant Morrison Jr. (When I say "Grant Morrison" out loud, I transform into a pint-sized super-version of him!). I can do this. No sweat.

With a decent enough artist, hopefully one that's at least slightly well-known, and quite capable, I can make Aquaman the brilliantly awesome comic it was meant to me. Arthurian fantasy. Madcap modpop. The thing writes itself.

And if you get Mike Allred to draw it, I'll pay you twenty dollars.

That is all. You are free to go. For now. But remember my offer. One day, I'll have to write Aquaman. Might as well get it over with, eh?

Aquaman Should Be Good. Over and out.

*ksshk*

Brains.

Yes, now I'm stealing gimmicks from other blogs. Blog link of the now!

Anyway, continuing the short-but-sweet blogging ditties, I've been playing a lot of Urban Dead, a text-ish-based zombie apocalypse massively multiplayer online RPG. It is fun. Check it out.

Watch this space

For those of you interested.

This is for my own records.
Continue going about your business.

Da Fug!

No, I never got around to writing that Seaguy thesis or whatever, but here's a post I just made on another message board which sums up most of my thoughts:

Yeah, Seaguy is pretty bewildering, but I liked it. It's a fugue-like madcap romp in a world that doesn't know it's crazy, and has charming characters and kooky stuff and all the things one likes in Grant Morrison comics. It seems to be mainly about how corporations and brands are trying to homogenize the world and rob it of its special qualities, and of the power of the individual; after all, individuation is a key theme in most of Morrison's stuff.

Seaguy is also the story of a child's life, or at least, I think so. We've got Seaguy, who is, apparently, a superhero, but he never really goes on any adventures; it could be all in his head, with Chubby da Choona as his "imaginary friend." There are also the parent figures; Anti-Dad is the father and he "dies" but his presence still lingers (I'm sure he's behind Mickey Eye, somehow), and as the "child" that is Seaguy discovers the horrors of the world, in his process of becoming an "adult," his world falls apart around him, the shadows creep in, it seems like everyone's after him, something harmless and cuddly turns into a giant penis monster, his "imaginary friend" dies, the girl he has a crush on (She-Beard... and if that's not a euphemism, I don't know what is) rejects him, the friendly old guy he hung out with turns out to be just like any other adult (evil and in the world of business... it's like when you hear that Mr. Rogers was a sniper in the military) and he runs off to hide with his mummy (mommy) on the moon, but the horrors of the adult world follow him anyway, and then brainwash him into being an imagination-less slave of an evil conglomerate.

So it's really a coming-of-age story about puberty and adolescence.

The ambiguous ending has me wanting more. Does the wink mean Seaguy remembers Chubby and is totally on top of the world, or that he only *thinks* he knows what's going on, but is really just a pathetic cog in the machine? I'm dying for the other two mini-series to wrap it up, but Cameron Stewart tells us that nothing's in the pipeline yet and might not be for some time, or ever. So who knows? Maybe Mickey Eye wins after all.

Stuff.

For those of you who may be interested: Penultimate Battlers, over at the Parodyverse. The second in a series of concentrated superhero madness filled with crazy ideas and imagination, much like this "Lithium Age" I've been talking about.

And over at Comics Should Be Good: Egg Story review.

Sent from a Lappy
Probably in the basement

He's Got My Vote!

www.walken2008.com

Healing America by Beating People Up!

Dammit, I'm going to have to buy this now.

Nextwave. Warren Ellis. Stuart Immonen. Two-issue arcs. D-List superhero rock star fight comics with an ADD anime vibe.

January.

If You'd Like to Read a Blog Post, Please Hang Up and Try Again

Yeah, so I tried to write some post or something, but I've come up with a distinct lack of things to say. A few things, though:

1. Yes, I'll be doing some reviews shortly, over at Comics Should Be Good--- not that they're of anything recent, just trades I've finally purchased.

2. Yes, I've got evil plans for some cool internet comiculture thing. We'll see if they pan out; sometime this year.

3. None of you sent me money; Bill smash.

3 ½. I like cookies.